In the last ten years there has not been two years in a row without a crisis
Turkish Businessman
Change is crisis and we are in a period of faster, broader change than at any other time in human history. Rapid change is the gravest crisis we face as people, this is because our behaviours are deeply rooted in evolutionary processes and so do not change readily, even if our superficial attitudes do. We look at the world, whether our own personal circumstances, or more broadly and develop perceptions which inform expectations which regularly clash with reality, creating barriers to peak performance.
Perception comes from perspective and directly informs expectations. If we fail to consider conflicting perspectives and contemplate the possibility of them being right, at least partially, then we will become uni-dimensional, a great burden when trying to improve oneself, whether physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually or materially.
Our expectations shape who we are. The trouble is our expectations are seldom our own. Instead they are shaped by our environment, especially our family environment based on past performance of family members, on how your grandparents came to this land from poverty, started with nothing and sent your parents to school and now you are useless. It's influenced by our peers whom we watch and expect to be like them. It shapes our worldview of what we deserve because we are here. Many things we expect as a matter of course we take for granted, healthcare, retirement, annual vacations. employment,success, owning a home and driving a car. Expectations are seldom thought out, they just appear.
Why is this important? Expectations are seldom ours, unmet expectations can be devastating; they destroy confidence, impact wellness and mental health. Unmet expectations prevent us from relentlessly pursuing our goals. They depress all resolve, unmet expectations are your reality.
Management of expectations is one of the most important factors in sustained Peak Performance.Financial analysts, politicians and football managers do this while predicting share prices and profits, election results, how the results of games impact the results of seasons. You too need to manage expectations to bring your imagined outcomes closer in line with reality. This does not mean settling for less, it means creating the space to try more.
Hope for the best, but expect the worst was the mantra of one of my high school teachers. While this is one approach to expectation management it is I think unnecessarily pessimistic, and so fails the reality test. Expectation management is a skill we all need, it is a practice, the more you do it the better you will become. Here are eight tools to help you along.
1. Form your own worldview, understand your bias, look for diverse information on pretty much every topic, look to the past results of people who are providing information and perspectives. This is time-consuming I admit but I think you have to weigh different viewpoints to see what is important, form your own view, to understand opportunities and threats. For example as a young man I went into flying aeroplanes, possibly as a career,a young person would have to think carefully today about doing this. The fact is that aircraft are already much more automated than cars. Converting commercial air traffic to complete automation is much closer than a self-driving car. The biggest obstacle to pilotless commercial aviation is that passengers are not emotionally ready to accept boarding a plane without a pilot. This will change in the not-too-distant future firstly for cargo, but ultimately for passenger traffic. If you expect a 40-year career as a pilot today I think you would be disappointed. But that is my opinion, form your own perspective, the important thing is that you're thinking, managing your expectations to align them more closely with reality.
2. Choose your goals carefully guided by your worldview, the situation where you are and your personal capacities. Take small incremental steps, stop, assess, adjust then restart. Do not set yourself up for failure by creating expectations unrelated to reality. Choose your goals and use your resources carefully.
3. Know you will have problems, some known but many unknown, the attitude is not to be surprised when unknown difficulties strike. Take the time two to three times per year to think about your personal risk and how you manage it.
4. Think through the hidden expectations you hold things you take for granted; should you? Will I always have this job, this room,girlfriend? Will I always be able to get my favorite chocolate? Will I always have this customer? The point is we have many expectations that we do not know are expectations. Search the depths and bring them to the surface.
5. Ask yourself what is my reality today, how does it compare to the expectations from last year? Two years ago? Unmet or exceeded? There are lessons and adjustments for both scenarios. As we have discussed before, more important than the event is our reaction to it, we humans do have the power to change the meaning of things good into bad or bad things to good, like Jesus turning water into wine, which depending on your perspective works for either scenario. Time in honest self reflection and awareness of reality will help you to assess expectation outcomes and adjust as necessary.
6. Expectations are for future potential realities. As such if you dwell on your expectations you are living in the future, one way to make sure that the future never happens. Setting goals, planning and expecting success are necessary and useful, but execution happens in the present. Racing Bobsleds I often had expectations of where I would finish. I soon learnt to leave them in the start house. Your execution is one of the few things over which you have complete control where you can bring expectations into reality. Execution happens in the present. to meet my expectations in a bob race “push- in-drive, one corner at a time, you do not have to drive the corner you just went through again and will not have to drive the fourth curve ahead until you get to it, stay in the present, which should be the goal of mindfulness.
7. Expectations create pressure for performance whether it is a race, an exam, sales growth, bonus or profit. You can be a veteran with your nerves under control until you find yourself face to face with an opportunity to outperform. It can then feel like the first time and you can fail big time. Learn to calm your mind in moments like this and how to create a calm body from a calm mind
8. Expect high standards from yourself, make that a reality. It is difficult, but uncomplicated, you have to make the effort, work.
In order to make realistic expectations we need a commitment to reality, and then maybe when we look back our expectations will have been met, even exceeded.
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